Retired Australian fast bowler Mitchell Johnson says the death of Phillip Hughes last year made him question the way he played the game.

Following a spectacular Ashes series against England in the summer of 2013/14, in which he took 37 wickets and terrorised the English batsmen, Johnson admits the tragedy hit him hard.

“It still hurts to this day. It definitely affected players around the world and I think it changed the game a little bit, for a while there,” Johnson told ABC’s 7.30.

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“I had that Ashes series where I was really aggressive and bowling a lot of short balls and I did hit players.

“And it made me think, was I doing the right thing? You know, was I playing in the spirit of the game?”

Former Test batsman Hughes was struck in the side of the head by a Sean Abbott bouncer while batting for South Australia in a Sheffield Shield match against New South Wales on November 25, 2014.

Phil Hughes was tragically killed by a bouncer almost a year ago.

In the end Johnson accepted that aggressive fast bowling was part of his game and the game of cricket – citing a long line of fast bowlers from Dennis Lillee, to West Indian great, Curtly Ambrose.

“That was my job as a fast bowler, was to be aggressive, bowl some short balls, be in their face a little bit,” he said.

And he reluctantly admitted that striking fear in the heart of batsmen actually made him feel “special”.

Not that he had always felt that way.

Along with some spectacular highs, Johnson’s career also had some pretty deep lows.

Most notable of these were two Ashes series (2009 and 2010/11) against England, where he struggled for rhythm and bite, as well as dealing with a broken toe.

He became the target of some merciless taunting from the England supporters group the Barmy Army.

“It was a pretty tough period in my career,” Johnson said. “I felt that I hadn’t given my all to the team and I wanted to go out there and perform at my best.”

Army hero helped restore confidence

To help with the psychological rebuilding he turned to Ben Roberts-Smith, the highly decorated Army veteran.

“He was great to me and he took me under his wing and I was able to go out there and be positive – he gave me that confidence to believe in myself,” Johnson said.

Johnson came back with a bang against England in the 2013/14 Ashes series. Photo: Getty

“He’s a hero for our country and I was able to spend some time with him and talk about a lot of things and I … was able to draw inspiration from him.”

Johnson’s resurrection was complete with the following Ashes series and the subsequent tour of South Africa, both of which he dominated.

But less than two years later Test cricket had lost its lustre for Johnson.

“It was in the first innings (against New Zealand in Perth) and I had the ball in my hand and I just didn’t feel that I had that want any more and that desire and hunger.

“That was the first real time out there where I really just felt I couldn’t be at my best for the team.”

Dennis Lillee, who first spotted Johnson’s prodigious talent more than a decade earlier and had mentored him, suggested that Johnson could play if he wanted to, but he would have to change his style.

That was something Johnson could not do.

“I’ve always gone out there and bowled fast, bowled my short balls, been aggressive,” he said.

Australia will miss the firebrand quick. Photo: Getty

“I just felt I couldn’t go the other way.”

And the bushranger moustache? Will that go?

“I think it’s going to go – I’ve been doing it for Movember again this year,” he said.

“But after that Ashes series, the boys wanted me to keep it forever.

“It was my new trademark and they said it was the magic mo.

“But the wife doesn’t like it too much.”

Now he is looking forward to rest and family life.

“I’m pretty sore all over and there’s a few little aches and pains that probably need to recover a bit and just get my mind right as well,” Johnson said.

Further down the track he hopes he will still be involved in cricket, perhaps coaching.

“I feel very privileged to have played the game and played as many games as I have for Australia.”

– ABC