If Australia thought its performance against Pakistan in the UAE – tucked away on Foxtel and slap bang in the middle of the spring racing carnival – would sneak under the radar, it had better think again.

This has been a massacre of such extraordinary proportions that it cannot possibly go unnoticed, no matter how obscure the venue or unfashionable the opponent.

• Spare us the arrogant baloney, Michael Clarke

Australia is rushing headlong to a 2-0 defeat at the hands of the ‘home’ side, its second innings a vulnerable 4-143, a deficit of 459, with one day remaining in the two-Test series.

Pakistan’s Azhar Ali celebrates his century. Photo: Getty.

Earlier, in 56 whirlwind deliveries, Misbah-ul-Haq ensured the series transcended a mere one-sided sporting contest and claimed a place in the game’s folklore when he smashed the equal-fastest Test century in history.

In doing so, the Pakistan captain joined the great West Indian Viv Richards, the man they called the Master Blaster.

Yet Richards smashed his runs in his prime in 1986 against an England side that was in the habit of being ‘blackwashed’ by the great West Indian teams of that era. (Shed a tear, cricket lovers.)

Misbah, at 40, should be slowing down.

Instead, he brought the supposed might of Australian cricket to its knees.

If the Western Sydney Wanderers produced in Riyadh what some good judges regard as Australian soccer’s greatest ever achievement, across the desert in Abu Dhabi Australia’s cricketers were unravelling.

Records started tumbling all over the place as Pakistan resumed at 2-61 on the fourth day, having led by 309 on the first innings.

Younis Khan was trapped lbw by Steven Smith for 46, a relative failure for him in this series.

Series over: Michael Clarke after his latest failure. Photo: Getty

But, given that he had already notched up scores of 106, 103 not out and 213, it was enough to give him a series total of 468 (average: 156), surpassing Sachin Tendulkar for the most runs in a two-Test series against Australia. 

Then Misbah went mad. His half-century came off 21 balls, beating South African Jacques Kallis’ 2005 world record of 24 balls.

His century took less time than an episode of Neighbours, and included 11 fours and five sixes from an improbable array of strokes. It was one ball quicker than Adam Gilchrist’s best effort, on a fast pitch in Perth. 

In the meantime, Azhar Ali completed his century before Misbah declared Pakistan’s innings closed at 6-293, a Himalayan lead of 602.

Like Misbah, Azhar’s ton was his second for the match, making them the first teammates to make twin hundreds in a Test since Ian and Greg Chappell against New Zealand in 1974.

Australia was left not so much with a target of 603 but the challenge of surviving for more than a day and a half in conditions to which they are seemingly allergic.

David Warner has at least flown the flag for Australia. Photo: Getty

It always looked a forlorn task.

Disaster struck early when Chris Rogers (2) was removed by left-arm spinner Zulfiqar Babar, followed shortly afterwards by Australia’s latest experiment at No. 3, debutant Glenn Maxwell (4).

Michael Clarke then completed his miserable series with the bat – 2, 3, 47 and 5  – when he was bowled by a sharp turner from the same bowler.

Clarke has the reputation as being one of the world’s premier players of slow bowling, but it seems that Australia’s ineptitude on slow, dusty pitches is so contagious that even the skipper has caught it.

David Warner, easily the best of the Australian batsmen in this series, managed 58 before he was removed by Mohammad Hafeez.

Wicketkeeper Brad Haddin’s badly bruised shoulder, which is yet to be diagnosed after he landed heavily on it during Pakistan’s first innings, only added to Australia’s pain.

And pace spearhead Mitchell Johnson didn’t return after lunch because of a sore hip, forcing Australia to employ two substitute fielders, Phil Hughes and Alex Doolan.

Warner took on the wicketkeeping duties in the morning session and Maxwell was the gloveman in the middle session.

Australia were bowled out for 261 on Saturday in reply to Pakistan’s first innings of 6-570 declared. Allrounder Mitchell Marsh, in his second Test, top-scored with 87.

Congrats to Misbah on joining the original Master Blaster, Sir Viv with 56 ball Test Century.

— Adam Gilchrist (@gilly381) November 2, 2014

– With AAP