Natalie Portman has been quoted as saying “Smart women love smart men more than smart men love smart women”.
Turns out she was wrong.
Those brainy ladies with their smart mouths are suddenly able to ‘have it all’.
According to a study ‘husbands’ are no longer threatened by ‘highly educated’ ‘wives’.
Hey single ladies! If you want it, put a Phd on it!
Hurrah! Feminism won! Our work is finished *sound of popping champagne and bras being pulled out of the incinerator and refastened*
So the study found that ‘in previous generations marriages where the husband was better qualified – and therefore likely to be the breadwinner – were more likely to last.’
The study by the University of Wisconsin concluded that married couples who are more evenly matched in levels of education are more likely to stay together now than back in the olden days. Clearly no one has bothered to inform Geoffrey Edelsten.
I have a million ‘issues’ with this study and the assertions. For starters, the participants are all married straight couples. We are not all married or straight. And people in the US are far more likely to be married, as ‘de facto’ relationships are not as widely recognised in the US as in other countries.
These days we don’t need a man for money and status. We have our own.
People who choose to marry are by nature more conservative and feel more constrained by social critique than those who don’t. And the dynamics of their relationship will reflect that.
This is evident by the fact they’re buying into a sexist, homophobic institution that has surprisingly not proven to be the magic love glue that religion, the state and mainstream movies and media have promoted it as.
Just because people stay in relationships does not mean they are happy. People who stay in relationships may mean they are more conservative and feel more constrained by ‘what will people say’ let alone fear, finances and opportunity.
Just because someone has a higher level of education does not mean they’re smart. See our politicians for further evidence. And just because someone has a low level of education does not mean they have less money. Hello Kardashians.
This study included people who have been married since the 1950s. Education opportunities have increased dramatically over the last 65 years. Particularly for women. So too workplace flexibility, childcare availability and social acceptance. More women are more educated than ever before. The expectations men have of women and women have of themselves have changed radically. Society as a whole has less problem with educated women. It’s not men, I mean straight married men, that have made some monumental leap in social evolution.
And just because women are making more money and have a higher level of education does not mean they’re doing less of the ‘home making’. Several studies have shown that women working full time are in fact more likely to be doing most of the housework.
I particularly loved this line:
“Overall, our results speak against fears that women’s growing educational advantage has had more negative effects on marital stability.”
Fears? Who’s frightened? We’re rapt! We have choices.
Some of us do not want to marry.
Some of us do not want men and instead want women. Or one of each.
Some of us do not see marriage or a relationship as a sign of success.
Some of us want to be single.
Once upon a time the main (only) thing men had to offer women was money and status. There was no need to work on personal growth, empathy, co-operation or fairness. These days we don’t need a man for money and status. We have our own.
Yes, some smart women want intimacy, companionship and someone to share their lives with.
But not only would smart women rather be single than be with Mr or Ms ‘They’ll Do.’ They have the money and resources to do it with. I’m with Lady Gaga on Getting Married: “I can buy myself a f**kin’ ring”.
And plenty of books.