The show-trials of former/future US president Donald Trump are the hottest anti-climax on Broadway.

Donald loves taking the stand. It helps him stand up in court.

He swore to tell the truth, the half-truth and nothing but the fake news.

A member of Republicans Against The Republic defended the floundering philanderer. “There are good lying cat-grabbers on both sides.”

Meanwhile, Donald Trump denies having sex with the adult actress he had sex with.

“Adult actresses give actresses who are adults a bad name – like ‘Streep’ and ‘Dench’.”

Trump insists he did not have sexual relations with that woman. “There were no relations there, it was just the two of us.”

Peter Dutton is not an elite. Photo: AAP

WHAT IS AN ‘ELITE’?

Opposition To Everything leader Peter Dutton is against an Indigenous Voice based in Canberra because it would be run by ‘elites’.

But what is an ‘elite’?

It’s best to explain what an ‘elite’ is not.

For starters, an ‘elite’ is NOT a politician in the back of a Commonwealth limousine speeding to their $300k plus-15-per-cent-super job on the hill.

An ‘elite’ is NOT the billionaire owner of a coal corporation.

An ‘elite’ is NOT a leafy suburb resident with three cars, a beach-house, private school fees and a labradoodle (unless they voted for the teals, in which case they are an elite cashed-up tree-hugger).

An ‘elite’ is NOT Conservative. Yes, you’d think they’d prefer to maintain the status quo that keeps them elite.

But no. Elites are Marxist, joint-in-the-glovebox, thongs-on-weekdays book-sniffers.

Elites studied literature, history and peace through pronouns while Dutton underwent Queensland cop training in phonebook defence and Taser tag.

Elites loudly talk the TikTok, but Dutton was taught it’s good manners not to raise your Indigenous voice.

Dutton insists he represents the man on the street. The man on the street was not available for comment. The other men on the street were all elites.

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