Life is tough. There’s no doubt about it. We’re all constantly faced with challenges. It’s terribly easy to allow the fear of failure to take over. It’s so easy, in fact, that most people do just that.

People allow themselves to be beaten by changes and challenges, rather than focusing on the positives. They tell themselves that they’ll never succeed – and let me tell you if you believe you won’t succeed, then you won’t.

I set intentions for success every day of my life. I want to succeed as a father, a husband, a coach, an entrepreneur and as a friend. It’s not always easy. Just like everyone else, I can become discouraged by setbacks. But I know something about myself that not everyone knows: I will succeed at my dreams because nothing can keep me down for long. It’s called resilience. I have it – and so do you (even though you may not know it yet). Everyone has the ability to bounce back. Even if you feel that your capacity for resilience is at miniscule levels, you can develop this quality of character. All it takes is some nurturing and direction.

Not sure how? Here are a few quick tips for developing your resilience:

Be kind to yourself

This is the most important part of getting through any challenge. You are your most powerful asset. You don’t want to put yourself down, do you? Of course not – you’re awesome! I know that, and somewhere deep inside, you do too.

Shift your focus

Get yourself out of the present moment and look to the future. You can’t do anything about the past. Nothing. It’s been done. You can change the future though. If it looks bleak, brighten it up a bit. Think about all the things you will accomplish.

Set your goals

You’ve probably heard this a million times. I know that I frequently work with my clients on goal setting. Why? Because it is vitally important. When you know what you’re fighting for, the desire to succeed becomes part of your daily life.

Keep working

Resilience is about overcoming your problems, not avoiding them. It’s about turning a crisis into positive challenge. But it doesn’t happen just because you want it to. You have to keep plugging away at it until you get it right. And soon, you will!

Scott Epp is a life coach who is passionate about helping you live a life filled with greatness, passion, wonder and possibilities. 

This article first appeared on Women in the Black.